I am an ovarian cancer survivor. So many emotions bubble up inside of me when I make that statement. Believe it or not, shame is the one that registers highest on the ol' feelings-o-meter. Why? I have long struggled with the feeling that my cancer experience pales in comparison with those of other survivors' so greatly that I downplay it at best and flat-out pretend it never happened at worst. I have first-hand knowledge of the kind of cancer that takes every last vestige of hope and energy away from you, ultimately ending in the loss of precious life. My family and I were all right there with my baby brother, Russell, when the heavy burden of a brain tumor was laid on his slight, young shoulders. We watched him battle through surgery, chemo, radiation and other treatments that left him weak and sick. We saw him lose range of motion and slip into a coma. We gathered at his bedside when it was "time" on more than one occasion, including that October day when his suffering was ended.
However, that same painful path was not planned for me. And, I might as well just say it, I feel guilty that what was laid on me was such "a walk in the park" in comparison.